The Gangs of … er, um … Baltimore.

How Mobtown got its name.

Yesterday, Martin Ford wrote an article for the Baltimore Sun chronicling antebellum gang violence in the streets of Baltimore. He went so far as to say that “The Gangs of New York” should have been set in Baltimore.

Personally, I think that is just plain silly, given the film’s name. Nonetheless, I feel an absurd pride in our city’s horrifically violent history. And yes, we did in fact give the five corners a run for its money.

Facts that Ford did not mention that I think are worthy of note:

Prior to the civil war, Baltimore was the second largest city in the United States.

Locust Point was the second largest port of entry for immigrants entering the states.

Facts that Ford mentions that I did not know:

The Know Nothing Party, also known as the Nativists (of which Bill the Butcher was a leading NY city rough) was actually founded and centered in Baltimore. Originally known as the Order of the Star Spangled Banner, veterans and the sons of veterans of the Battle of Baltimore originally organized to intimidate and browbeat the influx of Irish and German immigrants under the slogan “Americans Shall Rule.”

Unlike the New York gangs, Baltimore’s “clubs” had no compunction against the use of firearms. On election days, open gun battles involving hundreds of participants would break out on the street. In 1856, “election season casualties exceeded 30 dead and 350 wounded.” (Apparently, when my car was surrounded by modern day gang members shooting their guns into the air in calibration of the 2001 Super bowl XXXV win, they weren’t acting fucked up, but merely perpetuating a hallowed and long standing tradition.)

"The firing was as regular as if it were by platoons," noted an observer of one battle. The gangs invariably resorted to guns -pistols, muskets, short rifles and occasionally even cannons.

We were discussing the details of this article at work yesterday. One of my coworkers went so far as to say “New York was nothing compared to us.” Idiots that we are, our hearts swelling and our chest’s pumping, we were collectively beaming with pride over these facts, as though the ghosts of our ancestors were in some urban warfare Valhalla, kicking wussy New York ass.

Not that we hate New York at all. Actually, we feel just the opposite. New York is in fact the greatest city in the world. But, we’re Baltimoreans, and any Baltimorean who does not have an inferiority complex and a massive chip on his or her shoulder is simply not Baltimore.

The facts in this article come as no surprise to any of us. Any Baltimorean who visits New York will tell you, the relative feeling of safety and security that we feel in New York streets is unfamiliar and palatable. Whenever I visit New York (and all my friends have felt this same experience), I’m proudly thinking in the back of my head “Man, this is a fucking bitch town! These people wouldn’t even know what a rough city looked like!”

Is this idiotic? Absolutely! But, I’m sorry, any city that is fourteen times larger than us and can only manage a per capita violent crime and murder rate one seventh the size of our own just isn’t doing its job.