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The laundry room in my building was closed for repairs yesterday. I was in desperate need of some clean clothes so I went to the local laundromat. I actually like laundromats, there’s something to be said for being able to clean everything you own in less than an hour and a half.

While waiting for the clothes to be finished, I stepped outside for a cigarette. A car pulled up to the corner and a gold toothed woman leaned out the passenger side window and yelled “Hey, come over here for a second.” Knowing she was asking for directions and not feeling particularly confrontational, I ignored her attitude and walked over.

“Do you know where is ... Do you know where is?” she struggled before turning around and screaming into the back seat “What’s the name of that place?!” The back door opened and a child no more than ten years old stepped out on to the sidewalk and asked me, “Where is that place where they have that stuff for your piss?”

“Huh?” I asked, already knowing what he was looking for. I just wanted to hear him struggle with the question a little more.

“You know ... it comes in a vial and it’s for your piss.”

“Do you mean an organic cleanser that cleans your pee so you can pass a drug test?”

“Yeah!” His eyes lit up, ecstatic that I knew what he was talking about.

“Um, yeah, that would be Dave’s Natural Market. It’s a block and a half up on the left hand side.”

Without thanking me, the ten year old jumped back into car and they tore off down the street. Too bad for the kid that stuff doesn’t actually work. It looks like a juvenile probation officer is going to have a little more paper work on his desk this week.

Say what you want about laundromats, but stuff like that just doesn’t happen when you have in-unit washers and dryers.

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