Yes, I know, perhaps I should stick to the local politics. But a day doesn’t go by that I don’t thank my lucky stars that my parents chose to head north when they decided leave DC for the suburbs.

Exposed underwear, Banned in Virginia: by a margin of 60 to 34. Is a $50 fine the end of the world for exposed underwear? No, of course not. But who will be in charge in deciding what is a “lewd” display of underwear? Will people who bend over and unintentionally expose their underwear be fined? Will an exposed thong strap result in a legal penalty? Damn, I hope not. Thanks, social conservatives, you’re always good for a laugh.

Virginia House passes gay marriage constitutional ban. That’s the way to show those damn faggots!

A proposed constitutional amendment that would open all public property - including schools - to prayer and other religious activities passed the Virginia House of Delegates Tuesday. The resolution, which passed 69-27, is needed to curb a growing effort to silence Christians. I’d like to put this one to the test and slaughter a chicken on top of pentagram in front of the state Capital.

A proposal for “traditional marriage” license plate advances in Virginia. I wonder how far a “untraditional marriage” license plate would go in the legislature. I’m actually going to take a stand that is unpopular with other liberals on this one. I say let ‘em. There was a big bru ha ha in this state a few year ago over a “Sons on the Confederacy” license plate with a picture of the Confederate flag. I say if a redneck wants the world to know that he is a hater, all the power to him. I’d rather know which neighbors are best to avoid.

Conservative Virginia politicians are in an uproar over a high school play portraying a gay football player smoochin' up on another dude. According to Del. Richard H. Black, "Within our public schools, there is a tendency to encourage homosexual activity, to portray it in a cute or favorable light." What are you scared of, Mr. Black? Has the liberal media coerced you into having sinful evil dreams?

And my favorite of all, Fairfax County School board member, Stephen M. Hunt, sent a letter to 24 suburban Washington area principals, urging them to invite ex-gays into schools to warn students about the destructive nature of a homosexual lifestyle.

Come on, Mr. Hunt, do you really want that many pederasts in such close proximity to so many teenage boys?

Oh, by the way, that is my ass.

[many links via unrequited narcissim]