A friend of mine is an administrate something-or-other for Patterson Park. For months now he has been telling me they’ve been planning to install wireless routers in the park; and for months now I’ve told him that they shouldn’t bother. After dusk the park is closed, before dusk it is too bright outside to be able to view a monitor. Frankly, I just don’t see the point.

Yesterday, he told me some technology company has volunteered to install a router on top of the Pagoda. Apparently, the router is either going to be solar powered or have a solar cutoff switch -- when the sun goes down, so does the broadband.

“Oh good,” I said to him, “then you’ll finally be able to stop all the hustlers, junkies and homeless people from coming in and using their laptops at nighttime.”

“Actually,” he snapped back, “we’re installing it to keep YOU from coming in and w****** o** by the boat pond after dark.”

*ZING!*

Well... I can’t say that he hasn't thoughtfully planned ahead.